Sometimes, I think I'm epic at submitting to my husband. I follow his lead without a second thought. I don't fight back, manipulate, or hold onto my way.
Other times, my husband has a different plan than mine and suddenly I don't want to submit any more.
I have my own plan. I think my way is superior.
Suddenly, it's a real struggle for me.
Will I insist on my own way?
Will I submit to his way?
Will I submit gracefully or resisting every step?
The other day, we were walking back home together. I wanted a taxi, but he wanted to walk, so I submitted and we started walking. But then he wanted to take a new route to get to our back gate; I wanted to continue to the front gate, because I knew the way there. Suddenly I had a choice. I could submit without complaining, I could rebel, or I could follow while complaining & hope for failure. We did find our way to the back gate. I may have complained a bit, but I did my best to submit.
"Submission" is easy when my husband is asking for what I want to do anyway. It's no challenge because he's asking for what I was planning on doing before he shared his plan. As long as my husband does what I was planning on doing anyway, I don't know how well or gracefully I submit.
Submission is real and it's hard when I have my own way I want to do things. It's a choice that I need to make. It involves swallowing complaints & judgments. It involves trusting his decisions & not gloating if things don't work out. It involves encouraging him as my leader, as my head of the household. It involves being a trooper when tired & not throwing his decision back in his face.
Submission requires effort when I would have done things differently. Submission requires sacrifice.