As a volunteer missionary, I have my Mt. Carmel moments alongside my flights to the deserts discouraged. I have my Martha behaviors crowding out my Mary mannerisms.
I doubt like Thomas. I lie & deceive like Abraham & Isaac. I boast like Joseph. I judge & condemn like the Pharisees. I wander from God like the Israelites. I fear like Gideon. I sin like Adam & Eve. I am stingy like Nabal. I have pride like Aaron & Miriam. I try to replace God with myself like the devil. Ouch. I'm like the devil.
Yet, I also sing like David (just flip through his Psalms in your Bible). I weep with compassion like Jeremiah (or read Lamentations). I help like Abigail. I open my home like Mary/Martha & Lydia. I write like Paul (see Romans, the Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians, the Thessalonians, the Timothy's, Titus, and Philemon)...(ok, maybe not quite so eloquently). I invite like Andrew. I encourage like Barbabas. I seek the truth like Nicodemus. I dance like Miriam. I work like Nehemiah.
It's funny how the 10 negative examples came so much more readily and easily than the 10 positive examples. I'm talking MAJOR brainstorming to reach 10 positive examples to go with my 10 negative examples. The 10 negative examples flowed out of the pen and off my fingers, but the 10 positive examples struggled to form.
As a volunteer missionary, I still reach the highs & lows of faith. As a volunteer missionary, God is still with me, just as He is with you.